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An Obituary to Joggers

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Webster’s dictionary defines Jogger pants as, uh, well, actually, Webster’s dictionary doesn’t have a definition for joggers, because Webster's dictionary is way too busy defining words like "emoji" to pay attention to mere fashion trends. Despite their lack of recognition from a scholarly audience, Joggers were a trend that came, stayed, stayed a little longer, and then kind of went, but are overall most definitely here for good no matter what we do.

The droopier and poopier cousins of track pants, Joggers are more or less a tapered version of a pair of Sweatpants. Born from a need for comfort and casual style, along with the added advantage of being able to show off sneakers really well due to the slim ankle silhouette, joggers quickly skyrocketed into popularity with sneakerheads and fashion clientele alike. High end brands like Balmain and Rick Owens were present on the Joggers wave, middle tier brands like Rag and Bone, Acne, and Phillip Lim all hopped on the drop-crotch train, and street brands like Y-3, I Love Ugly, and Zanerobe commandeered the ground floor. Soon, fast fashion brands like Topman, H&M, and Zara grabbed ahold of the jogger trend and held on for dear life as the trend ascended into the upper echelons of fuccboi heaven and took over the cosmos. In no time, you could find Joggers in any store of your choosing. The humble Joggers had become mainstream.

Ian Campbell (Fellow FMF team member) was a regular college student who had bought a pair of cargo sweatpants from the Uniqlo x Alexandre Plokhov capsule collection entitled “Urban Sweat”. Proud of his comfy new purchase, he wore them proudly as soon as he got them, but quickly realized he was headed down a dark path. “After the tenth compliment from peers saying ‘nice Joggers, bro’, I realized I had made a mistake,” he told me, “I was turning into someone who might unironically use the phrase ‘high end kicks’ while browsing a ‘for sale’ post in /r/streetwear.”

To some, Joggers became more appealing than any other kind of pants. To others, Joggers became unwearable. To a few, the mere thought of drawstrings causes them to gag. They’ve become homogenized in the fashion world, indistinguishable from every other other piece of garbage we’re willing to drape ourselves in so that people look at us and think we have good taste. So with that being said, R.I.P jogger pants.